Life's Twists and Turns....

We have had quite the adventure this past week. On May 15th, I had my 20 week ultrasound where they do all the measurements to make sure that the baby is developing properly. We had already gone in early to find out gender so I was very focused on making sure my baby girl was ok. With Addie it was such a different experience. I remember being so focused on whether she would be a boy or a girl whereas this time, I think I realized just how much can go wrong. We were still super excited to go in and see our little princess again. 

When we first went into the u/s room, the tech asked me how my bladder was. I told her I had relieved it a bit (I was so uncomfortable, I couldn't help it). She threw her head back and sighed like I had ruined her day and then proceeded to tell me that I really needed a full bladder. I was a little taken back. She got me all prepped and started the u/s. Turns out she was able to see baby just fine, even with my bladder being emptied a little. Made me a little frustrated.  Moving on, we saw our little girl moving like crazy and I just was so happy but I couldn't shake this nagging feeling that something was wrong. The tech was pretty quiet the whole time and didn't explain too much of what she was doing. She would kind of answer questions when I asked but overall was quiet. My baby girl didn't like all the poking and prodding and kept kicking the u/s wand so hard that even the tech could feel it. I love that movement!!

We got to the end of the measurements and the tech asked if we knew the gender. We told her we did but we wanted to double check. So she quickly checked and said, yeah I think girl. We didn't even get a very good look at all. We ended and then I said to her, "I know you can't say much but I don't see my doctor for a week. (He was out of town) So from what you can see, does everything look good?" She shrugged her shoulders at me. My stomach dropped. I just didn't know how to take that. She gave us a couple pictures, bad ones, I might add. And she even cut one of the tops of the pictures off. It was a horrible experience and completely different than our previous gender u/s and also our u/s with Addie.

As we left, I still felt horrible and asked Shawn how he felt. He said she did a bad job but he wasn't worried about anything. I spent the next day in agony wondering if things were ok. But I knew that if anything was wrong, that I would hear from my doctors office. So each day got a little easier since I never received a phone call. I went to my appointment excited to see how everything looked. The first part of the appointment was pretty routine. Pee in a cup, get weighed, hear baby's heartbeat, and I was asked how I was feeling. My doctor came in and we started chatting. He said, "We haven't talked since your u/s, right?" That awful feeling came back. 

Turns out that there was an anomaly found during the u/s. Both of our baby girl's ureters are dilated. Basically there is a little tube that goes from each kidney into the bladder. Both of hers are swollen.  The picture below kind of illustrates this.

At this point, this could mean a lot of different things. I have to go in at 32-34 weeks for another u/s to check and see if they are still dilated. The problem could completely fix itself by then or it might not. There could be an obstruction causing the ureters to swell. If that's the case, she'll most likely need surgery once she's born to fix the problem. Or once she's born, it could fix itself. Or there may not be an obstruction but because the ureters are dilated, she could have what's called kidney reflux. This means that the kidneys send pee down the ureters into the bladder but the pee gets sent back up into the kidneys. This would also mean that she would most likely have to have surgery.

It's such a scary/peaceful feeling at this point. I get nervous and then I calm down realizing that we don't know for sure what's going on. I feel like I should be really worried and kind of prepare myself for the worse in case my baby needs surgery. But at the same time, it could be completely fixed in the next 10 weeks so I don't want to worry too much and get myself worked up for no reason. It's a sucky limbo to be in. So we're praying and hoping that things turn out ok. I've really been thinking a lot about the April 2004 General Conference talk by Dennis E. Simmons called But if not..... He talks about us needing true faith, not just faith that things will work out. He talks about us still needing that faith if things don't work out the way we want them too. So I want with all my heart for this problem to be fixed in the next little while but if not.... I'll be fine. My baby will be fine. We'll get through it. 

On a happier note, I'm still feeling good. I'm tired all the time but that comes with being pregnant and chasing a hyper toddler around. I love it. I love feeling this little one move. It's such an incredible feeling. Oh and we picked a name for our little girl. Her name is Raemee Kay Stinson. We love her so much already.